Sunday, December 29, 2019
Sunday, December 15, 2019
Monday, December 9, 2019
Sunday, December 8, 2019
Thursday, November 21, 2019
When first hearing of my diagnosis I often pondered the questions many ask. Why me? What did I do to deserve this? What sins did I refuse to forsake to bring it on? Did I fail to live up to the covenants I have received, just a year prior? Why is God torturing me? I had two people tell me unknown to each other an answer, without me asking for any advice. A sibling stated that this isn't a punishment to anyone. It's like the blind man when the Savior was asked whose fault it was he was born that way: the blind man or his parents. He responded neither. But that the powers of God could be manifest. And a friend added, ”the works of God being manifest through you.” Not exactly sure what that means but that through this trial, the works of God will be manifest. It felt to them that others will come to see and know the works of God through this.
Still to show the true weaknesses of my flesh I still doubt. I still wonder if some things that have been said to me were desires of their hearts, wishful thinking, or if it was Gods true will and desire. I told someone death is scary, but Christ is not. Christ gives hope, but the knowledge I have further gained of the afterlife, of His Resurrection, and how only those who have been sealed to the family of Abraham were resurrected from the spirit world has really morphed by views of the afterlife. The "righteous dead" were left to preach to those who refused to receive Christ until a later time when the hearts of the fathers are turned to the children and the children to those fathers in eternal glory. Its after all a desire of my heart for many years, desiring to be a greater follower of righteous and seeking the knowledge (or sealing) of the fathers as my blog slogan.
I told someone I should be satisfied with any progress made during this lifetime, even though I'm often an overachiever and want to "get it done" now, the Gospel plan does not work that way. Because what God offers affects the souls of all men.
When it has come to my spiritual journey I would not doubt many things when multiple witnesses were given, instead I would plant them and let the seed grow to determine if it was good or cast it out if it turned out it didn't. Though I did take time to ponder it out and make sure it was a proper source. When it comes to death and facing it head on I never imagined the struggles I would have. Nevertheless God and His Gospel offer's great hope. If it wasn't for a great family and children, I don't think it would be as hard as it has been. The thought of leaving them, this early in life's journey, is terrifying and saddening. I've shed many tears over the ordeal.
I share this all to record my struggles and the hand of God in even this journey. Sometimes when we only post the positive it can put a false impression on someone. I do not know if healing is in the future. Sometimes I worry its not. If it is, I kind of feel it'll be like the blind man who did not know till he was healed. Christ came and at that time he was healed unforeseen. At least that's my impression of the story. It's hard to have that type of hope when in just 3 months I went from walking to limited hand use, thumbs can't open bottles or button most pants, and walking up and down stairs is now difficult. Barely hold my phone, lift hands above my head, or walking to bathroom is a longer distance for me now. It's one of the worst diseases man can have but at least I keep my mind. I am already miserable in some ways. Physically atleast. I prefer healing. I want it. But such a thing feels hopeless when answers keep allowing for the possibility of not being healed and as I'm often told plan for the worst hope for the best.
At times my heart tells me there is still some things left for me to do here. Its not yet my time. But I don't know if its thoughts everyone faces or just personal wishes or an inkling of an impression as this is one I have not yet received witnesses of. In a blessing given to me I was told I was to record, or preserve like those did in the Book of Mormon, a record of some events. Maybe I have already done that, with this blog, or its things yet to remain, or sometimes the future can change. Nothing is static.
Still all things are given for our good. There is a purpose behind all things we suffer in this world and it passes as if it were a dream. I am reminded of the saying below.
"The greatest among us cannot be trusted with the power of God, not yet anyway. The greatest among us is still in need of repentance. Every one of us should walk fearfully before God, not because God is not generous, but because what He offers can turn you into a devil. The only way to be prepared and not fall, is to realize the enormous peril you potentially present to the universe. Before you get in a position to enjoy the status God offers to us all, you need to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, exactly like Paul said. You need to purge, remove, and reprove"
I've seen dark before, but not like this
This is cold, this is empty, this is numb
The life I knew is over; the lights are out
Hello darkness: I'm ready to succumb
I follow you around (I always have)
But you've gone to a place I cannot find
This grief has a gravity, it pulls me down
But a tiny voice whispers in my mind
You are lost, hope is gone
But you must go on
And do the next right thing
Can there be a day beyond this night
I don't know anymore what is true
I can't find my direction; I'm all alone
The only star that guided me was you
How to rise from the floor
When it's not you I'm rising for
Just do the next right thing
Take a step, step again
It is all that I can to do
The next right thing
I won't look too far ahead
It's too much for me to take
But break it down to this next breath, this next step
This next choice is one that I can make
So I'll walk through this night
Stumbling blindly toward the light
And do the next right thing
And with the dawn what comes then?
When it's clear that everything will never be the same again
Then I'll make the choice to hear that voice
And do the next right thing
Wednesday, November 13, 2019
Monday, November 11, 2019
What separates us from God is Time.
Time does not exist with God.
Therefore ask yourself this.
This Telestial world when it becomes Zion becomes Terrestial.
When the Terrestrial World meets its measure of creation it will receive its Paradisaical glory (AOF 10) and become a "sea of glass" or a great Urim a Thummin (Celestial World).
If those places are here right now but only separated by Time and Time does not exist how are they all here? How is it that the Telestial world, the Terrestrial world, and the Celestial world are all here but separated by Time?
Joseph said it would be a great while beyond the grave to learn our salvation and exaltation. We will literally move up by degrees in our perfection. This goes along with Josephs teachings on Jacob's ladder and the 7 rungs to perfection.
Saturday, November 9, 2019
Christ or the Messiah came among the Jews in the meridian of time that all might he drawn unto Him. Christ descended below all things that he may rise above it all so that we may also rise up if we will repent and show forth good fruits.
Tuesday, November 5, 2019
What are Fellowships:
Monday, November 4, 2019
While this post is only a glimpse about my life growing up with my brothers, sisters, schooling, and marriage its also written with the intent for my children to know a bit about myself and my love for my siblings and parents in my life. Its just a few things that have come to mind but I know I may record more elsewhere. It's a condensed version of my upbringing.
I grew up in Holladay Utah since I was 1 year old overlooking the gorgeous SLC Valley. I lived there till I was married.
I could not have asked for a better family to be a part of. My parents are very loving people and always respected the kids and allowed them to do many creative activities. My mother has one of the kindest souls I know. She is very accepting of everyone. My father is very intelligent (as well as mother) and passed down some of those traits to us kids. Our whole family is very analytical. My father is also calm and content in his personality as I don't remember him ever yelling at us as kids or putting us in timeout. I am such a fortunate person to be raised in such a great household. They did everything they could to help us become the best people we could be and raise us up in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters (Sister->Sister->Brother->Me->Brother). I am the younger middle child. Some of them married before I was too old. I remember with my younger older sister that while she was in high school she had many jars of change. I really wanted to go to the Tilt and play arcade games. I got into her room and took half her quarters so I could go there. Or taking all the perfumes out of her drawer because I wanted to smell them. If I recall correctly I think I remember her complaining about them always disappearing. Now she knows why.
I might of been pretty quiet growing up, and still am, but I still enjoyed the great family I had. I have always been the person to just enjoy others company by my presence not always by being a chatter box which I've never been except with my wife. I probably open up with her more than anyone. Its what makes our marriage so great. I can tell her anything.
Looking back at my life I am not sure if I was always the easiest child to raise. I was very quiet and stubborn as it could take an entire day for me to do one thing asked of me just out of spite. Because no-one can tell me what to do :D. As soon as I was told, even if i wanted to do it, I could no longer do it. Luckily after my teenage years I was able to overcome this for the most part. I remember one night in high school that my mother worried about me and some of my friends I was hanging out with so she knelt down next to my bed and prayed for me. I think she thought I was asleep.
Because the family is pretty laid back we often just enjoyed being around each other. My father traveled a lot for work and would take each kid to a place with him or a few of the siblings. We went to Hawaii where I got to see many of the sites and travel around the island including pearl harbor. I also went there later with my wife when married which was very enjoyable. We had taken a boat into the water to go whale watching. Went snorkeling in the water but being afraid of deeper water and sharks I ended early.
I also went to Washington DC and saw a lot of the sites there including the war memorial wall and the big tower. And another time went to Italy and Sardinia. In Italy I got to see the cool Roman Colosseum. It was a lot bigger than I thought it was going to be. The fighting arena was kind of bizarre too think about and having people duel in the area.
During my high school years around age 16 I remember turning a bit more rebellious. I had a group of friends that were not religious and while my best friend, which I will always consider a deep and deer friend but lost contact with due to dating life and college after my mission, we hanged out with some people that enjoyed doing some rebellious (from cultural standards) activities. I still consider myself a good kid but I did take part occasionally in some of these activities though I often liked to avoid them. Smashing mail boxes was not my thing so I stayed home. But other times a large group of friends (like 10 people) got together and knocked out some stranger on the street that confronted them and ran away before cops found us or stealing a wake board from a boat on a random street. This was the same kid that went into Dan's and blew an air horn till the manager had to kick him out. We thought it was hilarious and stupid at the same time. Fortunately we avoided these things for the most part compared to other friends I knew which kept us out of getting in trouble. Teenagers don't always do the smartest things.
My favorite things growing up was skateboarding at the skate park and snowboarding in the winter. It was my place to escape from the world and just enjoy something I loved. I wasn't amazing at them but I was able to do some simple fun moves as well. I remember having a few falls. I did stop almost entirely after my LDS mission. Like trying to front board snowboarding down a rail and falling forward on my face knocking me out. Or going off a jump catching an edge and falling backwards landing on my back and barely being able to walk from it for days afterwards. Or Skateboarding and often falling flat on my face from not landing the move correctly. I am fortunate that the worst thing I had experience besides two bad falls snowboarding was only sprains no broken bones. Though when I was younger I did ride a bike with no shoes and caught my foot on the tire cutting the entire big toes portion on the foot off (the round part where your foot sets on the ground). Or having front wheel fall off and landing on my face with a bloody face.
I went to kindergarten for part of the year. I remember not caring for it much but my mother decided to home school me. I don't remember exactly why. So that is when I learned from home, went to a few home school activities and built some things with people there. I spent a lot of time in the backyard just playing in the mud and creating water villages out of it. I often would dig giant holes in the yard looking for Gold or treasures. I remember calling my dad at work and asking him if there was gold outside.
During 6th grade I went to a private school. Mount Vernon Academy. I really liked this school a lot though sometimes for the first year I was the kid that people picked on or made fun of. I was the odd home school kid that didn't have very good social skills. By the end of the year I remember another kid coming that had some struggles, like wetting his pants at school. The teacher told us to be nice to him as not everyone was like me that could push himself into the group and get to know people. Because I was the new kid and people didn't know me. By this time I had started to make friends with some of the people which is why the teacher said that. Sometimes people will just withdrawl when not accepted immediately. I even had a funky hair cut if you look back at some of my images. Which I thought I liked at the time :D. Still my best friend growing up was someone that lived down the street from me. He was the one person that was always there for me when I didn't have a lot of friends. I was also the personality that preferred a few close friends than many that I didn't connect with well.
After 6th and 7th grade I went back to public school for 8th and 9th at Churchill Jr high. This is where my close friend went so I got to spend a lot more time with him. I didn't care for public school much but did want to keep going. But my mother decided to put me in a charter school for 10th-12th grade. It was the Academy for Math Engineering and Science (AMES) inside of cottonwood high school. They provided college classes to students so you got college credit while also getting high school credit. This helped me get a head start in my college career which I was grateful for. I made some great friends here as well. I know it's hard to see them after we have kids and a busy life.
After high school I went to the University of Utah and got my bachelors degree in Computer Science. I had always planned to be a developer but my job opportunities kept sending me into Quality Assurance which I ended up loving. So kept doing it. I always thought I may do some development at some point but things keep shifting in ways that the opportunity wasn't the right time and felt we were definitely led in a direction to bring us where we are today.
While at the University of Utah I attended LDS institute. I loved going to the classes that taught about the Gospel. Sometimes I felt like maybe going to two classes so I could learn more about things. While there they also had a sorority and fraternity program in the institute so it was based in some form of spirituality.
My fraternity was called Pi (like 3.14...). I really enjoyed going there and all the activities they did were a lot of fun. One of the activities was with a sorority where we played capture the flag. It was during this one where I first met my wife. She got put in jail after I also got caught and put in jail. I remember liking her and wanting to talk to her but was a little shy. We chatted for a little while while swinging.
My fraternity friend contacted them and we setup a get together to go bowling. She tried to talk to me there, she said she thought she told me she had liked me but I don't recall it. After we went hiking up to the Big U on the mountain behind the U of U. Her friend did come up to me this time and asked me if I liked her. And told me she had been divorced but that she liked me. I wasn't sure how serious they were at this time. She pried into me to see my interest level as well. So after seeing Amanda go to the U on the hill I decided to follow her up there with her and we chatted a little bit.
We went on one more event to a haunted mansion. I do remember after this event having my frat brother telling me she really did like me. And that is when we started texting as he just gave me her info. Than during finals week, on my birthday she said we needed to go on a date. I didn't want to, due to stress of finals and engineering is not an easy time for finals. Asked to do a different day but she pushed me to go which I'm glad. She drove from west valley, 30 mins, to the institute building where she met me. I had fallen asleep in a chair in the building. Luckily she must of liked me enough to try to find me when I didn't pick up the phone and she woke me up :).
From than on out we dated or hanged out for a few months than started dating. Finally I proposed after 2 years and we got married and had 3 beautiful boys. One time I was at a friends house and I was talking with him. He asked me if I liked her. I said I like hanging out with her. I don't like to commit to things till I'm 100% sure it can and will happen. That's also why I usually don't decide on doing anything till a day or two before. Never know what could come up. Than he instantly said, uh oh your going to get married as you usually don't care for any girl that you actually like hanging out with in a relationship type of way (not friendship). I felt he might be right but didn't know what the future held at that time.
From there we moved to Tucson Arizona which is now where we reside now. We know not what the future holds at this point as we plan for a terrifying yet completely unknown future. My wife has loved being in Tucson and am grateful she convinced me to move down there. As its been a big blessing for both our lives and the kids absolutely love it. And we both have gotten to know some amazing people down here and families.
We also had a lot of good times. We often went to Disneyland and I got to know the ins and outs of how to never stand in line yet get on all the rides. A place that meant a lot to my wife as its been a place for her to get away from the trials of life and unwind during some of the hard times she went through before we met. Its now become a place for our family and three kids as well and good memories. Or going to the beach in California.
I was extremely happy throughout my entire marriage life. My wife will often say I'm an anchor to her. I help ground her and she does the same for me. We make each other better people. And our kids brings absolute joy into our lives. She sacrificed so much with cholestasis to bring these kids into our lives and the last one with a nickel Alergy. She went through a lot of health issues but those sacrifices gave us the greatest gift we can have in this life.
Friday, November 1, 2019
You made me laugh and allowed me to be myself unaltered. Loving me for who I was not what you wanted me to become. You were patient, loving, caring, and helped me want to become the best version of myself. For me and for you.
Emerson you are my first and you are very intelligent and inquisitive like myself. I see a lot of you in myself. You are a very kind soul and I know you will overcome the trials you will face in the coming days. You currently love to build things with Legos and currently wants to be a builder. You like to make sure you can do something good before trying it out, the perfectionist side of things, which makes it hard to accept any failures. I was that way too as a kid until I grew partially out of it. You just want to be the best you can be so you think through everything before doing it.
A Simple Message: Summary
I'm an open book so some of these posts might be more personal. It's just more convenient sometimes to post things in one place for easier access.😄😋
I came across a cool item on Amazon below. It allows me to record an audio or video for the kids that they can listen to. In-case they loose access. The message I posted above is the recording below. Section under "To My Children."
This is to my lovely three children. Emerson Eli Hunt, Daxton Ole Hunt, and Callahan Liam Hunt. And my wife Amanda. I love you all so much.
Thursday, October 31, 2019
This series, since its my spiritual blog, is oriented to my faith and spiritual journey along with my love for my family. Part 1 is just my spiritual journey.
This led me to an area in Rochester where I met with a stake Patriarch. This conversation I thought was normal among the people. I thought his experiences were normal. He asked me if we are too be regarded as Adam and Eve in the temple and it represents us. Than ask yourself "When does Adam die in the temple?". I pondered that for years to come. He brought up that the people who visit with you, in the temple, are the angels in heaven. They will prove us. Mentioned how some things had changed overtime in endowment but the symbols were the same. And at that point I than realized that we were all meant to "converse with the lord through the veil" - here and now as Adam never dies. That the endowment was only "preparatory" and only if we were "true and faithful" would the blessings be given. It shows a path but does not walk it for you. I came to learn this is what Joseph taught which he called the doctrine of the Second Comforter.